Pleasure - the fine art of "Pleasing you" Mmmmmm! If you want to TRIGGER the fk out of the feminine especially say the word pleasure! You will feel base chakras tightening in their defence mechanism everywhere! The wounding around matyrdom, hyper-independence, hard work and distrust of the masculine will all come out to play. 

I'm here to stand up for pleasure and sing out loud that pleasure is a portal! A portal that has been denied and shut down, but which is now opening back up. Pleasure changes everything!

Here's a client story (shared with permission).
My client was nearly at burn out. When she came to see me she was 'working hard', really didn't have any joy in her life, wasn't having any sex or self pleasure, looked older then her years, and was getting constantly sick. It took time to allow in the concept of pleasure in to her life. The wounding and her programming that she had heard constantly when she was young was 'you have to work hard to get what you want".

This had made her amazing at being in her masculine and at doing all of the things, but hadn't allowed her to have any relationship whatsoever with her inner feminine, or to open up to receiving. This was evident in all of her relationships where she rushed around helping family and friends, and then became resentful when she required help as she never got any support.

As we worked with her old programmes, she began to get conscious of the ways that she was creating her life. She began to find a new place inside of her of safety around allowing herself to be supported, to receive and to experience pleasure in all of its forms. This was life changing! She even began to start doing things that she enjoyed! No longer bitter and resentful as she was taking care of her own pleasure this started to over flow in to her whole life. 

The pleasure she began to give herself started out with small things like taking time to be with her hands around a hot cup of coffee, the breeze on her face. She began to say no to people (oh la la that is just soooo sexy!!! ) and take time time for herself, putting herself first. Then as she unlocked the pleasure door she began to experience a level of pleasure that she had never known. It radiated out from her, changing how she looked, her whole energy field and her 'presence' and ability to connect in with the divine. 

The conditioning around pleasure is so insidious. We've really been sold a "hot lie" in terms of denying ourselves pleasure. 

Where I see the wounding play out the most in the feminine is here

• Working so hard that you have no time for yourself or anything that gives you pleasure, joy, fun
• Eating in a way that is so restrictive that it lacks any joy
• Moving our bodies in ways that are forceful, unkind and lacking in self love 
• Being Molly Matyr and putting everyone's needs above our own (here's your dinner with a side of resentment).
• Feeling like you can't trust the masculine energy to support them. 
• Denying time to rest and shaming ourselves if  we do. 
• Feeling GUILTY for spending money on yourself, taking time out, or for doing things that you love or even meditating!!!  Just guilt guilt guilt guilt guilt.

The antidote to this is to:

• Become conscious of these old outdated stories that are often running you around allowing in pleasure. These are collective conditioning stories that are crumbling to the ground. 
• Releasing SHAME around pleasure. It ain't a sin to receive pleasure and to give yourself pleasure people! 
• Allow yourself to become conscious of your DESIRES. This one is SOOOOO big! Most people don't even know what they want because they feel so unworthy of receiving it. 
• Have a daily ritual of self pleasure. Make it a priority. Maybe that is the hot cup of coffee, or the sunshine on your face, the earth beneath your feet or a beautiful cosmic orgasmic moment in any way shape or form (yes yes yes yessssss!) 

In my own life,  opening up to allowing in more pleasure has been so life changing. As a Scorpion, I've always been hot on pleasure as one of lives greatest gifts, and find myself now calling myself a pleasure witch! I've had to become conscious of many old programmes that I was running around allowing myself time, rest, space, my desires and am now deeply embedded in pleasure and joy as being a huge part of my life. 

If you read this and find yourself feeling triggered, that's okay honey heart. These wounds are deeply embedded in our society and it can be hugely annoying to see them bought to light. 

What if you could allow in just a flicker of things that light you up, turn you on, make you fizzy and do them again and again and again and again and again.....then what if you could couple that with your strong intentional desires?This is the pleasure portal where we bring together pleasure, desire and watch those dreams come true. 

Breathing here with you as we all collectively rise back up in to pleasure. 

Love
Gilly 

Recently, I was asked this question and thought I'd answer it here

Question : "Have you ever had your body go out in sympathy with someone else's?"

Answer: Ahhh yes empath life! In my 20s I got a headache which I never normally got when I was staying with a lady. I knew it wasn't mine, and then this was confirmed as she told me she had a terrible headache. 

This was a massive wake up call for me as I realised that my highly sensitive nature made me a sponge for other peoples physical ailments as well as there emotional states. 

A lot of my work is about teaching ways to manage our energy with both emotional and physical energetic boundaries so we don't take on other peoples "stuff"

Here are a few quick tips:
1) Set your energy up first thing in the morning. I have a routine of movement then meditation and connecting in with my inner guidance before I engage with anyone or anything (no phone!). I set a very clear intention every morning that I am in my own energetic bubble. If it helps you, imagine a solid gold bubble around your aura or energetic field. 

2) When you are with someone and they are in an intense state keep your energy located in the lower half of your body. Wiggle your toes if required. Avert your eyes or cross your arms if required or take a break from the energy. 

3) Practice good and clear energetic boundaries. By knowing your own emotional state before you engage with others you will know what is yours and what is theirs. 

4) If you pick something up, which happens as an Empath HSP, make sure you clear the energy from your field by a method that works for you. These are some of my personal favourites; going in to water, washing my hands, an ocean swim, a magnesium salt bath.  Grounding by putting my feet and hands on the ground. Saging the space and my energetic field.

5) Intention:  At night I clear my field by saying "I call back my energy and release anything that isn't mine back to the light and so it is"

ENERGY Is REAL
Your energy is your GOLD.

Just like cleaning your teeth, it is important to keep a well maintained energetic system for your whole systems well being. 

Every individual is different and whilst these practices are good general advice, it is important to look in to why you overly empathise with others and if there is a codepence, energetic dependence, addiction to rescuing, saving or need to escape your own field. Working together we go deeper in to these subtle and often tender spots and work to call your own energy back to yourself. I've seen literal miracles occur with people returning their energy home to themselves. 

Love
​Gilly 

I remember, in my 30's, standing in my kitchen of my beautiful home, with my beautiful loving family, and feeling this deep ache within.  An ache, a longing. It felt like an ache that could never be filled by anyone or anything.

I had never ever heard someone say the words "souls homesickness", but as I stood there, that is what was whispered to me.

It was a watershed moment, as I understood that as a soul having a human experience, no love on the earthplane would ever truly fill me with the deep, unconditional love of our souls home. 

As I described it to my client "This ache, ...the longing, the soul's homesickness". There were tears in her eyes as she finally felt seen. "Yes that ache...that feeling of never having the love that I know I had before I came here"

I want to bring the "souls ache" to light, because so many of us as highly sensitives or empaths have this deep ache within our soul, that we call so many other things.

Once we realise that this ache can never fully be satiated by life or by anyone here in the physical.. we begin to see the source of so many of our addictions and heart ache. 

As we acknowledge this deep longing or homesickness, we begin to be able to be in the contrast of this experience here on earth more fully. We accept that we have always been looking for the source of unconditional love, and we stop searching outside of us and come back home to ourselves. We stop gazing outwards at addictive behaviour to fill our souls ache and we apply that beautiful balm of love to our hearts. We allow ourselves to be in deep compassion with ourselves and deep reverance for how hard it is to be away from that absolute unconditional love, and we begin to find the small flicker within our heart that turns in to a burning inferno of self love. 

I invite you to dive more fully in to this ache and find what lies beneath it as it is a beautiful and very sacred invitation home to yourself. 

To book a soul session, and to untangle your story, receive clarity, clear addictive patterns, and allow in more joy, and learn to fill that souls ache by returning to yourself click here

I’ve recently lost the weight I packed on last year.
Mannnn I resisted losing it though.
“Fuck it I she cried - middle finger raised high! “
I had to gently take myself through my intuitive tapping process.
Firstly I wrote out all of my inner shiz about weight and my body.
My inner REBEL was screaming!
My inner rebel rocks. She’s rebellious, opinionated, not afraid to speak up, a real fighter.
However left without love she can become my inner saboteur.
I listened and validated all of her ANGER, her RAGE, her desire for FREEDOM, her tears of FRUSTRATION.
I held her in so much love as we tapped together.
She felt so heard.
I asked her if she was happy being heavier…she told me in no uncertain terms to fuck right off and that she could be any weight she wanted.
I loved her even more in her glorious staunch rebellion. I told her I loved her hard out no matter the size of her ass (this is truth)
Then as the gaze of grace and compassion softened her edges and the power of alchemy came in ….she began to shift.
She realised she could be a proud rebellious empowered woman but also love herself enough to be strong and healthy.
The tapping released emotions and old stories that weren’t serving us both so quickly.
The compassionate heart hold made her feel so safe. She would continue to have a voice.
Here’s to our sassy inner rebels and to listening to those stories
so we become conscious of our inner saboteur!!! Freedom

I woke up today with the phrase on my lips "complicit in the lie"

The fairy tale from my childhood  "The Emperors New Clothes" came to mind. 

f you need reminding, here is the story. In a  nutshell it is about a very vain Emperor who is conned in to thinking that the clothes that are being made for him are so amazing that only those of high intelligence can see them. 

Everyone on his staff is so afraid of losing their jobs or being termed simple, that they all agree with the Emperor that his clothes are incredible, when there are in fact NO clothes. 

The emperor ends up parading through the streets naked! 

It isn't until a young boy - a truth speaker exclaims "But he has nothing on" that the lie is set free. This truth is then whispered through the crowds, until everyone starts to speak the truth. 

The emperor, knowing full well he actually isn't wearing any clothes, continues on in his parade pretending that he has in fact got the finest clothes on rather then admit that he too has been duped.

So I ask myself why? Why do people remain complicit in a lie, rather then speaking the truth?

• Is it the fear of speaking up with a different opinion?
• The fear of being rejected?
• The fear of being ousted?
• The fear of being persecuted?
• The fear of being a trouble maker?
• The fear of being different from the status quo? 

I remember in my 20's watching a 'healer' at an expo in Auckland working on a woman. A crowd of us were watching him as he touched her breasts as part of her 'healing', I thought to myself 'why is no one screaming out STOP?'

But as I looked around me, it seemed as if everyone was okay with what was happening. This made me doubt myself. Maybe what he was doing wasn't wrong (it was!). Maybe I didn't know what I was talking about. Maybe I wasn't as advanced as these other healers. 

Is it any different from those that turned a blind eye to abuse in its many forms over the years. The neighbour with the black eye, the kids that were clearly not being looked after, the co-worker who was being touched by the boss? Complicit in the lie?

So what do we do when we are faced with an "Emperors New Clothes" lie:

• Do we stand up and tell the truth like the little boy did? 
• Do we agree with the lie for fear of what might happen if we tell the truth, like his servants?
• Do we continue on with the charade like the Emperor, because we are so far down the track of our own parade, that we can not admit that we have indeed been duped. 

Or is there another way?
Do we quietly accept that our intuition, our wise inner voice, and our own knowing knows that something isn't right. Do we turn away from the parade and the charade and leave the emperor to it. Leave the crowds of those that are complicit in the lie, and go home, focusing on our own rising truth, creating sanctuaries for those, for when they are ready to hear the truth?

In my own journey, I have found that for HSP (highly sensitive people), speaking up requires a lot of support. Truth becomes freed when it is expressed in to loving, compassionate, kind, non-judgemental spaces. A special alchemy occurs when a truth is heard by someone who is able to hear it, to hold it , to validate it and to reflect and mirror it back. 

This piece is a curious enquiry to create thought. I have no answers, only questions and am interested in your feedback.