I did a video on my instagram story last week. At 3:33am I woke up panicked! The story had automatically uploaded on to my facebook and people I knew were commenting (LOL). My nervous system went in to high alert. I deleted the story from my facebook and went back to sleep.
In the light of the morning, I, of course, felt totally fine and had to have a wee chuckle at how my old wounds still trigger sometimes.
Like many of you, I've had many lives where I've been killed for speaking up, being different, being a witch (hellowww Halloween baby, even had a wart on my nose when I was 13!). Even if you don't believe in past lives, we hold within us our previous generations pain particularly within the feminine of being shut down, repressed and killed.
12 years ago I stumbled across EFT or the Tapping technique. I had a session with a lady at this time around showing up more fully with my work. I'd been hiding in the shadows doing healing, but I knew that I was blocked. We worked together but I just knew that it wasn't from this life time.
Luckily life led me to an amazing woman who also did past lives within the tapping session. When I entered in to the past life I saw that I had been the local town healer. I was only 12 and the chief was dying. We both knew that it was his time to go, and so I prepared him some remedies to help him transition. The tribe however weren't ready to let there chief go and blamed me for his death. He died, and, you guessed it, I was banished from the tribe. Which meant certain death.
I had carried that fear deep within my being and when the memory came up I was able to clear a layer around speaking up and being seen.
This deep trauma and fear had been lurking in my energy field, unwitnessed and unseen. Obviously it still comes up sometimes, but nothing like it used to where I would literally make my intuitive abilities invisible.
Over the 7 years that I've been using Tapping with myself and my clients, I have organically developed the Intuitive Tapping Process which goes deeper then traditional EFT and encompasses Past lives, clearing through multiple time lines (future even), Akashic Records, Intuitive healing techniques, compassionate witnessing and a myriad of other Intuitive practices.
I'm so excited to share this course with those of you who this resonates with. The course starts on August 31st and runs for 4 weeks with 4 live calls as well as pdf of tapping scripts that I've intuitively downloaded. You can use these with your self, family or clients. This will be a small intimate group so you will have the opportunity to receive individual tapping within the group setting. The best part of tapping is that you get borrowed benefits from tapping along with others.
If you are ready to be empowered you can read more about the course here, or to experience an individual session click here.
I’ve recently lost the weight I packed on last year.
Mannnn I resisted losing it though.
“Fuck it I she cried - middle finger raised high! “
I had to gently take myself through my intuitive tapping process.
Firstly I wrote out all of my inner shiz about weight and my body.
My inner REBEL was screaming!
My inner rebel rocks. She’s rebellious, opinionated, not afraid to speak up, a real fighter.
However left without love she can become my inner saboteur.
I listened and validated all of her ANGER, her RAGE, her desire for FREEDOM, her tears of FRUSTRATION.
I held her in so much love as we tapped together.
She felt so heard.
I asked her if she was happy being heavier…she told me in no uncertain terms to fuck right off and that she could be any weight she wanted.
I loved her even more in her glorious staunch rebellion. I told her I loved her hard out no matter the size of her ass (this is truth)
Then as the gaze of grace and compassion softened her edges and the power of alchemy came in ….she began to shift.
She realised she could be a proud rebellious empowered woman but also love herself enough to be strong and healthy.
The tapping released emotions and old stories that weren’t serving us both so quickly.
The compassionate heart hold made her feel so safe. She would continue to have a voice.
Here’s to our sassy inner rebels and to listening to those stories
so we become conscious of our inner saboteur!!! Freedom
I woke up today with the phrase on my lips "complicit in the lie"
The fairy tale from my childhood "The Emperors New Clothes" came to mind.
f you need reminding, here is the story. In a nutshell it is about a very vain Emperor who is conned in to thinking that the clothes that are being made for him are so amazing that only those of high intelligence can see them.
Everyone on his staff is so afraid of losing their jobs or being termed simple, that they all agree with the Emperor that his clothes are incredible, when there are in fact NO clothes.
The emperor ends up parading through the streets naked!
It isn't until a young boy - a truth speaker exclaims "But he has nothing on" that the lie is set free. This truth is then whispered through the crowds, until everyone starts to speak the truth.
The emperor, knowing full well he actually isn't wearing any clothes, continues on in his parade pretending that he has in fact got the finest clothes on rather then admit that he too has been duped.
So I ask myself why? Why do people remain complicit in a lie, rather then speaking the truth?
I remember in my 20's watching a 'healer' at an expo in Auckland working on a woman. A crowd of us were watching him as he touched her breasts as part of her 'healing', I thought to myself 'why is no one screaming out STOP?'
But as I looked around me, it seemed as if everyone was okay with what was happening. This made me doubt myself. Maybe what he was doing wasn't wrong (it was!). Maybe I didn't know what I was talking about. Maybe I wasn't as advanced as these other healers.
Is it any different from those that turned a blind eye to abuse in its many forms over the years. The neighbour with the black eye, the kids that were clearly not being looked after, the co-worker who was being touched by the boss? Complicit in the lie?
So what do we do when we are faced with an "Emperors New Clothes" lie:
Or is there another way?
Do we quietly accept that our intuition, our wise inner voice, and our own knowing knows that something isn't right. Do we turn away from the parade and the charade and leave the emperor to it. Leave the crowds of those that are complicit in the lie, and go home, focusing on our own rising truth, creating sanctuaries for those, for when they are ready to hear the truth?
In my own journey, I have found that for HSP (highly sensitive people), speaking up requires a lot of support. Truth becomes freed when it is expressed in to loving, compassionate, kind, non-judgemental spaces. A special alchemy occurs when a truth is heard by someone who is able to hear it, to hold it , to validate it and to reflect and mirror it back.
This piece is a curious enquiry to create thought. I have no answers, only questions and am interested in your feedback.
The part of you that knows:
I want to take a moment to lovingly honour and acknowledge the part of you that 'knows'.
This part of you that has known since forever. It has no rhyme or reason. It isn't rational. It can't be explained. It can't be convinced.
It has always been and will always be.
I know that as a child you knew things. You felt things before they happened. You got glimpses. Whispers.
Over time you forgot, or you gave up those knowings because it was so uncomfortable.
Knowing made you feel responsible.
It often bought with it rejection.
And then as you got older, you remembered. All. the. times.
Something hadn't 'felt' quite right.
An inner voice.
An unknown sensation that had 'warned' you.
A vague whisper
And then as you gently began to honour your truth. Your knowing.
It's big, and its powerful.
It feels like you returning home.
***There's nothing left but you and your knowing. ***
I'm here to greet you in that 'knowing'.
I know how it feels to know things before you are 'meant' to know them. I know how uncomfortable it is to voice a truth that no one wants to hear and for it be rejected. I know the pain and I know the loneliness. I also know the strength and the ferociousness it creates.
I stand with all of you who know things, even though you don't know how.
There is a part of each of us that longs to assign blame to another. We look outwards to our partner, our family, our world and we see “wrong” in the other. We blame our leaders, our governments, the rich, the “powerful”, and yet the true nature of this world is that we live in a hologram. As uncomfortable and disconcerting as this may be, it isn’t until we gather all information, enotions, feelings, that we project and gently harness it together to be tenderly held and witnessed that we are able to alchemise our projections. And because we are so very human and we believe that we are all disconnected we see the “other” as wrong and us as right. What if we could take a moment to stop looking outside and very gently ask ourselves where we are that which we judge. Where are we divisive? Where are we at war? Where are we not in our truth. This is deeply uncomfortable work as it is far easier to blame, be a victim and forget the true nature of our multidimensional self. The truth is if it is within our experience it is here for us to integrate and is serving our evolution individually and collectively on some level - even when it very much doesn’t feel like it is. I’m holding love to us all as we allow ourselves to witness ourselves more fully through the most gentle loving and kind eyes.
The difficulty with being a multidimensional soul in a human form is that we get to hold two contrasting realities.
Whilst we may “know” things “feel” things, we also have to live in a world that is governed by certain laws.
We have to do things that we may not want to do to exist in a human body.
Maybe we have to earn money in a way that isn’t totally aligned.
Our multidimensional soul self often rebels against this as a feeling of having freedoms taken away, for as a soul we are so free.
However, what if we were to “lean in” more fully to the experience of being HUMAN - rather then resisting against this experience.
What if we could become a little more curious about what our life’s experiences are teaching us on a soul level.
What are we learning from feeling these limitations, these conditions?
How does this trigger an emotion within us. Do we grieve for our true home where we are completely free? Do we feel a sense of fear at not being able to have complete freedom.
Do we feel anger at this experience? I’m here with you in both polarities holding this as a soul having a human experience and a human having a very human experience.
Running from “what is”, denying or avoiding isn’t our path to freedom. Freedom comes from embracing what is here. Now. In. This. Let’s take a collective breath and know that we are safe, here now in this. We are exactly where we need to be and this collective clusterfk is serving us on so many levels.
One of our deepest fears is being rejected. Firstly from our parents and those who provide for us, then from our friends, and also from society.
So many people have rejected themselves time and time again in order to be “acceptable”, “fit in”, “comply”.
Our current world events speak to a deep fear within the psyche of humanity that fears being rejected, abandoned and left out.
Simply put the way to get a collective to comply is to turn the organism against itself - by doing so creating a feeling of “us and them”.
The truth is that if every single being on the planet came in to their own truth for just 1 second and operated from that place (whatever that might be) there would be an automatic end to division.
It is only when we reject parts of ourself that we can feel rejected by a society that is for the most part so unconscious of its inner truth that it will take whatever truth is taken up by the masses in order to fit in
I grew up with a very normal family who had zero interest in anything yoga or esoteric, yet by the age of 18, I was at the first of many mediation courses.
By age 20, I had enrolled in a Transcendental Meditation course, and have been meditating on and off and off and on for that long.
Now....don't get me wrong. I was a normal teen, and partied like only those who lived on the other side of this century used to.
I certainly wasn't all ommmms.
However, on and off I'd come back to meditation. It would pick me up from falling down and plant me back in my body.
When I reflect on this now, nearly 30 years later, I just think how frickin weird that was. I mean seriously. Past life much.
Why am I so passionate about sharing my love of meditation with you?
I honestly believe that meditation is the best kept secret of our time. It is like pure gold and the best thing ...it's FREEE.....but its always been so curious to me - how people don't do it.....
And guess what:
Even if you do 3 minutes 3 x a week (come on sister you have that time).
Even if you do 3 minutes once a week.....please please please do it.
Being a highly sensitive person and an Empath, meditation has been the foundation and the place where I can go, where no one else's energy can effect me, and where I can come back to me.
The benefits are plentiful with so many health benefits being scientifically researched (science eventually catches up with what we soul sisters always knew!), as well as so many benefits for our state of mind.
Benefits I personally feel from meditation:
It actually makes me a bit sad to think of how people struggle through life, when they could be dancing a little more... with this very simple practice.
I write this blog, in the hope that it might make you over ride the power of your egos voice (the voice that wants you to remain stuck, in drama, and in pain) and tells you all the lies about:
There is a jewel inside of you, and it is so beautiful and so sacred, and yet we are often so afraid to reach in and touch it.
I encourage you to touch it....reach for it.
Like that song said in the 90s"If you buy this record your life will be better"
Wellllll "if you meditate your life will be better....your life will be better...your life will be better yeahhhhh"
Dances around room!
See ya in the pace between the here and now!
p.s) I honestly am curious as to why people don't meditate, so please do feel free to comment below. There is never any judgement from me. Thank you.
Many an Empath will know this one well:
Whilst on the face of it, this may look like a very noble, kind and loving thing to do, this is in fact a way that we abandon ourselves in order to help, heal or please others over and above ourselves.
In the process of abandoning ourselves, we actually leave our energetic bodies and become so enmeshed in another persons energy, that we leave ourselves wide open for our energy to be filled.
There are ways that we can help others without abandoning ourselves:
1) Be in your own physical body - When you are talking to someone , start to check in with yourself. You can do this by feeling in to your own physical body. Wiggle your toes or move any part of your body, rub your arm, rub your hands together.
2) Avert your eyes - Take a moment to close your eyes, blink, look away, and break eye contact.
3) Breathe - If in doubt breathe out.....long and strong and loud.
4) Keep checking in with yourself energetically - Ask yourself "how is this feeling for you". If you get a negative response...take heed and excuse yourself to the bathroom, or to make a call.
5) Take your time to respond - The 'people pleaser' within the Empath can make us strongly desire to make another feel good, at the detriment of ourselves. Rather then rushing in and agreeing with the person, take a moment to check in with your own truth.
6) Have a daily practice - Place your hand on your heart and say to yourself "(Your name) I will never abandon you ever again. I am always here for you" This creates a powerful energy within us so that we know that no matter what is occurring around us, we know that WE are safe!
Once we begin to develop this relationship within our own hearts, and with our own inner child, letting her know that we will NEVER abandon her energetically, physically or emotionally, it sets up a strong inner trust within ourselves.
Of course, just like everything, this will often feel like it is becoming tested as we become conscious of it.
If you would like to book in for a complimentary 30 minute Soul Session please email email@example.com
For years I didn't really understand that I was an Empath and couldn't fathom why I could feel other peoples pain as if it was my own.
Why was I so emotional and so sensitive?
Many times I rejected my true nature, and tried to hide it to fit in.
In my 20's I would get drunk and give readings to random strangers in bars (thats a great use of your gift there Gilly).
All I wanted was to be 'normal'.
Like many of my clients, my journey has been about understanding and accepting my true nature, and working with the grain of what is our natural souls essence so that we become empowered and live a life that is authentic and joy-filled for us!
I remember my cheeks actually burning with shame when I sent an email to a friend saying I could give her some healing. Unbeknown to me I had hit 'reply all' and the email went out to all of her friends.
I giggle now - as if I was some terrible axe murderer!
I'm sharing this because I know that my honesty here will help someone know that it is okay to be YOU. Whatever quirky, weird, and wonderful way that looks.
The truth is that the more love and acceptance we have of ourselves the better this world is!
How are you doing so far in 2021?
I know a lot of my clients are feeling like things are changing rapidly for them.
*What is feeling like it is being birthed for you this year? New ways of being? More peace? Greater joy? Deeping in to purpose? More intimacy? Stronger Boundaries...what has been coming up?
*What roadblocks or clusterfks have been coming up for you?
I would love to hear from you....